NLP for self confidence and self esteem20 min read

Low self-esteem can be the root cause of all types of problems. From eating disorders through to relationship issues.

How can we love others if we don’t love or value ourselves?

If we don’t love or value ourselves,if we have low self-esteem, it can lead us to feel that maybe there is no benefit in properly taking care of ourselves.

But it does not have to be like this.

Low self-esteem is something we learn how to do and, and if we can learn how to do it, we can just as easily unlearn it.

How do you know when to be confident and when not to be?

We may all, at times, experience a slight loss of confidence; perhaps if we have received a poor result in an exam or feedback from a boss that we hadn’t expected or missed a sales target or we are filled with unnecessary self-critical thoughts or just simply not seen the results we were hoping for.

Some people may be anxious, others may be shy. We all behave in the ways we do for a reason.

However, some reasons may not be very helpful and lead to low self-esteem and low self-confidence and these states are not helpful; they can lead to depression and ill health.

What can we do?

NLP offers an amazing set of tools that enable us to identify new ways of thinking and feeling, to provide us with new options that enable us to look at the world differently – confidently, and assured in our own ability to do the things we want to do and be the person we know we can be.

So for example let’s take self limiting beliefs. They hold us back and can seriously erode our self-esteem, but they can be easily addressed when we work with submodalities.

Or how about the feelings themselves, such as the feeling of confidence itself? We can use NLP anchoring techniques to allow us to manage our emotional states so we are working from a place of excellence rather than of limitation.

We don’t have to feel low, we can feel great!

To sum up

We can feel better about ourselves, even great if we want to!

Perhaps it’s not an instant process, but if we recognise we want to change, have the tools to do so and work at making it happen then the sky is the limit!

I think it is well worth bearing in mind a few of the ideas that are covered in the presuppositions of NLP…

• Everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have available.
• People have all the Resources they need to succeed and to achieve their desired outcomes.
• Every behaviour is motivated by a positive intent.
• You are in charge of your mind, and therefore your results.